Yes, It's Headline Time Again!

Jobs growth surprisingly robust in April

Steve puts on 40 pounds

Aussies warned of copycat kidnappings

Aussie copycats advised to avoid travelling abroad

U.S. to Open Remote Forests To Logging

Hippies Thrilled to Have New Trees To Hug

More Sunlight is Hitting the Earth

Bush blamed

Manufactured News

At Least They Admit It

Episode III: Attack Of The Media Droids

Yoda says: "Defeat the Media Droids, We Must."

Elvis Lives!

What? You Thought I Was Dead?

Bush calls Belarus last dictatorship

Democrats call America last dictatorship

Microsoft now backs gay bills

Gay bobs, rods still unsupported

Big Pharma's New Funk

Has Decent Bass, Drums, But Is Otherwise Like Earlier Releases

Documents show Vioxx sales tactics

Documents spell it V10xx

Wang Liqin wins World Table Tennis Championship

Heh. They said "Wang"

Japan warns it will break 20-year moratorium on whaling

Japan hopes it will no longer have to eat whales for "research"

Viagra for the mob? This can't turn out well...

Someone will be "whacked" for sure...

*looks over shoulder....*

Marching to a VERY different drum

Oakland, CA mayor Jerry Brown

'Whore College' Offers Hands-On Training

Also Offers Training For Using Other Body Parts

Screeners Find Live Snake in Suitcase

Say It Smelled like Cap'n Crunch Cereal

Bobo the Chihuahua in Hot Water Again

Broke Vow to Never Go to Korea Again


on that note, i will leave you to laugh uncontrollably, chuckle delightedly, snicker for a bit, click over to Moe, or Dane's sites, or do whatever you do after reading my headlines.

good night, y'all!